Today it is not easy to stay emotionally stable and resilient amidst all challenges that we have to face everyday. Many seek professional help from psychologists, psychiatrists, and counselours. We all have to deal with negative emotions such as anger, pain, or sadness. But is there a way that can help us take control over our emotions and stay calm in tough times?
Last year I attended a silent meditation retreat in a Buddhist temple in Southeast Asia and I will share some of the wisdom I learned during this journey. Despite the harsh living conditions in the middle of the jungle, I am grateful for this experience as this equipped me with a powerful tool to face the constant challenges in life.
Wat Suan Mokkh Monastery, Thailand
Female dormitory
For beginners, adapting to these practices can be challenging due to the harsh living conditions in the wilderness. However, achieving fulfillment and inner peace by leaving behind the comforts of the modern world represents a profound spiritual journey. While it is difficult for us as novices, for the monks, it is a path to a truly happy and fulfilled life.
My cell in the monastery
The four noble truths are the foundations of all Buddha teachings.
The FIRST Noble Truth
The first noble truth is called ‘dukka’. In Pali, the native language of Buddha, it means suffering. It explains that birth is suffering, aging is suffering, sickness is suffering, death is suffering. Even pleasant feelings can be suffering, because pleasure is short lived. If we think about it, we will understand that what makes us happy now, it is impermanent… and when it’s gone, we will suffer.
The SECOND Noble Truth
The second noble truth is ‘samādāya‘. It means origination and refers to the cause of our suffering. The cause is the craving. Craving for permanence in an impermanent world. Believing in that, we construct a false world of illusion… and because it’s not real and we can not be satisfied, it leads us to continual pain and disappointment.
The second noble truth explain us also about the concept of ‘upādāna’, translated as clinging, grasping or attachment. Attachment to people, things or ideas which eventually will lead to suffering due to the natural law of impermanence.
The THIRD Noble Truth
The third noble truth is ‘nirodha’ and it refers to the cessation of suffering. One must realise that craving is actually true reality and not delusion of reality.
The FOUR Noble Truth
The four noble truth is ‘magga’, also known as the ‘Eightfold Path’. It’s a set of eight principles that can help us liberate from craving.
The first three deal with Wisdom:
- Right Understanding – Do we judge others? Do we try to understand them?
- Right Intention – Do we have positive thoughts?
- Right Speech – Do we use the right words at the right moment? Do we gossip or ill speak?
The other two principles deal with conduct:
- Right Action – How do we behave?
- Right Livelihood – What do we do for a living? Do we harm animals or other people?
Last three are more technical and deal with the mental discipline.
- Right Effort – Do we invest the right amount of efforts to make all these principles work together?
- Right Mindfulness – Are we mindful of the small things in our daily lives?
- Rightfulness Concentration – Do we practice meditation?
In one of my one-on-one sessions with the nun at the monastery, I asked her about the Buddhist perspective on death. She shared an example: if someone called to tell her that a friend had died in an accident, she would feel some initial sadness but would also be mindful of the impermanence of life and the inevitability of death. While we can’t change these facts, we can choose to be fully present and spend meaningful time with our loved ones while they are still with us.
With the nun who guided me in my first steps in Buddhism and meditation
This experience at the monastery has profoundly transformed my life, increasing my awareness of various aspects of it. Most importantly, it has helped me develop what I now consider emotional stability. Meditation has become a powerful tool for connecting more deeply with my inner self and building the strength needed to navigate life’s challenges. I view meditation as a bridge to a true connection with ourselves, which is crucial for creating a fulfilling life and nurturing healthy relationships.
